Mar 5, 2010


You know what has always bugged me?  Movie reviews that take a "I'm so much smarter than you" route.  Every movie review I have ever read takes this approach.  They sit there and with a fine tooth comb and condemn every aspect of the movie or they praise the intellectual aspects of this cinematic experience.

Me, I just want a simple review.  Did the movie achieve it's goal.  How was the acting?  Was the script/story any good.  Was the movie entertaining.  Add a positive comment.  Add a negative comment.  Finally make a simple scale and rate that movie accordingly.

It's not asking for much.

Reading a movie review shouldn't have to be a chore.

So let's make that scale

   1.  Punch me in the FACE, because that's gonna be better than this movie.
   2.  I will never watch the movie again
   3.  Did I actually pay to see this?
   4.  I wish I saw it on cable.
   5.  I'll only watch it if its free on cable.
   6.  Can't find the I guess I'll watch this
   7.  This is better then the other stuff that's on.
   8.  I will watch the movie again
   9.  I CAN'T WAIT to watch the movie again
 10.  This movie WILL be owned, in any form because it's that damn good!!.

Now let's review some movies...

Percy Jackson & the Olympians The Lightning Thief

This movie was good. Not great. The special effects were very good. But now awesome. The acting was average. Nothing special. This movie had all of the elements to make it an amazing movie. But it ended up being just OK. It had it's moments, but when all was said and felt like Harry Potter meets Hercules.


Saw VI

Being a fan of the Saw series, I was looking forward to this one.  It had all it's usual gore moments, but nothing truly spectacular.  It did a great job connecting all of the dots to the previous 5 films But I think it's finally played itself out.  Don't get me wrong, I'll watch the next one, if there is a next one.  The acting was consistent, the story mostly predictable, with a few surprises thrown in.

7/10 but mostly because I am a fan of this series.
Year One

I wanted to love this movie.  I wanted to.  But it seemed like the whole thing was forced.  The jokes weren't that funny and the story (even for a comedy) had no direction.  It was like watching a a really bat interpretation of Mel Brooks's History of the World part 1


Terminator: Salvation

Being a fan of the whole Terminator story line I was stoked.  I know that any movie franchise has to have it's weak moment and I thought "Rise of the Machines" was it.  After spending some time with the Sarah Connor Chronicles, I honestly figured this would make the 12 year old in me just "SQUEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"  The TV series had all of the flavor of the first Two movies, how could it possibly fail.

By giving you characters you just didn't give a damn about.  Christian Bale as John Connors is unlikable as you can get with out being the villain.  The only person you end up caring about is Kyle Reese played by Anton Yelchin, and he wasn't in the movie enough to really build a connection to.  If it wasn't for the AWESOME special effects this would have been the first "Punch Me In The Face" movie


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