May 31, 2008


Quote of the day:

There will always be a part, and always a very large part of every community, that have no care but for themselves, and whose care for themselves reaches little further than impatience of immediate pain, and eagerness for the nearest good.

Samuel Johnson
English author, critic, & lexicographer (1709 - 1784)




Because the little news they actually report, they end up sensationalizing it. It's not enough that there is a tragedy, but let's make sure that we can scare everyone else in America and make it worse. What the hell am I so incoherently talking about?

Well let's start at the beginning...

I don't watch the news anymore and haven't since 1988-1989. The local news channel had this commercial playing while I was getting ready for school.

The line went "RIGHT NOW THERE SOMETHING KILLING YOUR KIDS IN YOUR HOME." My sister was between 3-4 years old so this scared me, a lot! So that night I made sure to watch the news.

They talked about non-child proofed cabinets were leading to an increase of children's accidents and deaths.

At the time this pissed me off (and still does). They took something that every parent should do (but many don't), and turn it into a scare tactic to improve ratings.

I vowed that day to never sit down and watch the news. Something I have held true to this day (with the exception of September 11th, 2001 and for about a week or so after that truly tragic event).

So now let's fast forward to this past Saturday.

While Season and I were having a completely unhealthy breakfast at McDonald's I noticed a TV behind me. It was on CNN. Season says "Oh they're talking about the bus that crashed." I turn around and I see the tag line SAFE RIDES?

I started to lose it, but the simple fact that there were kids around I reigned it in, till today.

How much mileage can these so-called news stations drag out of misery, pain and death. I'm sorry but accidents happen. That is why they are called accidents.

Otherwise they would be called murder because they would be on purpose. My condolences to the families and loved ones of this shocking and heart breaking moment but a big FUCK YOU to so called news agencies who have turned it into a shock TV moment. FUCK YOU to the so called reporters who have turned this misfortune into a scare tactic to make Americans believe that they aren't safe anywhere.

The following bit of information, may open your eyes to what the media does to the truth.

According to data gathered for NHTSA's (National Highway Traffic Safety Administration) Fatal Analysis Reporting System, in school bus crashes over the last couple of decades, fewer that 10% of school bus occupants have had any injury and 90% were not injured at all. The occupant most frequently injured is the bus driver since that seating position does not have the same passive occupant protections that passenger seats have, such as flexible and padded seat backs.

The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration reports that 96 percent of the estimated 8,500 to 12,000 children injured in school bus accidents annually are considered minor (scrapes, bumps, bruises, etc.).

NHTSA calculated that 4 percent of the school bus-related injuries to children -- about 350 to 475 annually -- are serious (i.e. broken bones or worse) based on the medical community's widely accepted AIS or Abbreviated Injury Scale.

An average of six children are fatally injured inside school buses annually.

About 16 children are fatally injured as pedestrians in the loading & unloading zone around school buses annually. That's better than 200 percent improvement from 75 school bus fatalities in 1975; it is still not good enough.

I agree that these numbers are still not good enough. But it's an improvement and it's a very good start!

But compare those numbers to these.

On average, there are more than 6 million car accidents on the roads of the US, annually. More than 3 million people are injured in car accidents, with more than 2 million of these injuries being permanent.

According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration there are about 43,000 people killed in fatal car accidents each year in the United States.

From this information I'd rather ride the bus then get into my car. But I'm not here to scare any of you. I'm just giving you the cold hard facts. There are accidents and whether it's a fender bender or a fatality they happen. Every accident that happens is an emotional and terrifying moment. All we can do, as a whole, is try to be safer. Pay attention to our actions, reactions and environments.

But mostly we as a whole need to be educated to the truth.

Not to the exploitative journalism that preys on our fears.

Not the tabloid journalism that twists the facts.

Especially not to the ratings whores who take these horrific moments, to intimidate and terrorize us all.

Let me leave you with this last article because I agree with everything he says.

Why America's media sucks
November 19, 2004By Ben Ho
Media herding is something that always piqued my interest. During the Clinton administration, church burning suddenly became a big issue. It seemed like the news was reporting a new incident every other week.
They held Congressional hearings. Important men fulminated about the rampant problem of racism.
Then you look at the data, and the number of church burnings had been decreasing monotonically for as long as data was available. In fact, it was at an all-time low that year. The only thing that changed was the media coverage.
A few years ago, the big media story was shark attacks; lots of scary articles warning about shark attacks. Yet again, looking at the data, the numbers were tiny - less than the chance of getting struck by lightening - and again, there were fewer attacks than in previous years.
A year ago, it was kidnappings of young white girls, though once again, the number of kidnappings has also been declining.
Court cases are particularly amusing. Why is Scott Peterson so prominent, when there are lots of murders each year that people ignore?
One possible explanation is that the media is only giving the public what it wants to hear.
When one media outlet figures out a story that resonates with the people, the others just jump on the bandwagon and copy it. Once the media makes a big fuss, people start to think the story is important, and it feeds on itself - a vicious cycle of triviality.
The question to ask is how problematic is it?
Having this deluge of stories around a few select anecdotes often gives very wrong impressions about the actual state of the world.
The problem is that statistics and data are boring. They lack salience. People are much more likely to remember the poor woman with ragged clothes and disheveled hair than arcane numbers about those in poverty.
I read Time magazine every week. I am bothered by the fact that most of their news articles are primarily based on random quotes from random people across the country.
Who are these people? In a story about unemployment, they interview three random people and somehow think they have provided a complete picture of the problem.
I remember a few years ago, there was the Million Mom March in Washington, D.C. where women showed up protesting the lack of child safety locks on guns. They probably had in mind the horrible stories they saw in papers about little kids who accidentally shoot themselves.
Economist Steven Levitt finds that, statistically, having a swimming pool in a house is 100 times more deadly to children than having a gun. Levitt's point is not that we should have more guns, but that we spend so much time worrying about guns that we forget about safeguarding our children from far more significant dangers.
Hepatitis and malaria - both preventable diseases - kill more people a year in Africa than AIDS, yet AIDS gets all the media attention and more funding. AIDS is just a sexier disease than malaria. Lack of awareness has serious consequences.
Despite my general pessimistic view on the selective focus on social issues by the American populace, this is one area where I do think education can work.
It needs to start here. Harvard - yes, the Stanford of the East - actually had the good idea in requiring a statistics class for all of its undergraduates. The university wants its students to find meaning in statistics and be aware of their potential misuse.
An old definition of a scientist is someone who can get excited by a page of numbers. But we need everyone to get excited.
An informal poll of federal judges found that the great majority could not define the following words: mean, mode and median.
At the very least, we need reporters to be educated. It may be that salient anecdotes are the only means to get their point across. So far, they haven't been driving the right point home.


I watched Steel today. It was awful the first time around, when I paid money to see it. Watching it for free was worse. I truly hate myself.

May 30, 2008


Damn the internet with all it's distractions, although I'm now current with Justice League Unlimited, Doctor Who & Torchwood. WOW, I'm lame.

May 29, 2008


How old is the first person on your top friends?
If I told you that she's just go off and pummel me.

Will you talk to the person you like on the phone tonight?
NOPE, I actually hat talking on the phone.

Do you own a computer?
nope...I own a device that allows me access to porn from around the world.

Why is your myspace song, what it is?
I don't have a myspace song, and I've never heard the song "what it is?"
hint-read the wording on the question

Where was your default picture taken?
At the Estrogen Clans reunion 2 years ago.

Do you like messages or comments better?
I'll take any and all forms of communique

What woke you up this morning?
the cats knocking over the "to be sold CD's"

What is your current mood?
Hung over and getting myself motivated to cook

What color shirt are you wearing?
I'm at home...why do I need to wear a shirt?

Are you crazy?
why? what have you heard?

Ever had a near death experience?
yes, I rode in a car with my sister driving

What was the highlight of your week?
so far...breathing. I happen to enjoy that a lot.

How long is your hair?
it's all

Last thing you ate?
a peanut butter and strawberry jam waffle sammich

What was the last thing you drank?
a diet coke

Are you happy right now?

Last person you hugged?
my wife

Are you wearing make-up?
nope, I gave that up when Vince Neil amd Motley Crue went their seperate ways. Yes I know they are back together again, but it's just not the same.

Who do you most look like in your family?

Did you have a dream last night?
uhhh sure, let's go with that

What were you doing at 11:30 last night?
going to the bathroom.

Are you left handed?

What's the fifth text say in your inbox and who is it from?

What did you do today?
worked on my blog (i know i'm such a loser)

Who was the last person's voice you heard?
My wife's

What is bothering you right now?
allergies are a bit annoying, while waiting for the drugs to kick in

Have you ever seen somebody get hit by a car?

Who do you tell everything to?
my wife (apparently this is my default answer, heh)

Have you ever taken a picture in a bathroom?
yes...oh wait, you weren't being polite? You actually mean "a picture" heh my bad

Do you use big words?
only when the little ones get redundant

Favorite number?

Name a part from the song you're listening to?'s not a song.

Do you fight with your parents often?
whenever I get the chance

Where is the shirt you're wearing from?
I'm at home...why do I need to wear a shirt?

Do you know anyone with cancer?
not anymore

Do you have any picture frames in your room?
this room...nope

Where did you spend Christmas?
in my wife's arms

Do you get good grades?
I graduated high school

Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? infected...hurt like hell...never re-pierced again

Have you ever passed out on the bathroom floor?

Do you start the water before you get in the shower or when you get in?
depends on whether or not I'm running on time or late

Would you rather be in a permanent relationship or play the field?
I'm married. if I play the feild now, my wife's retribution would be swift and severe

What did you accomplish today?
I finished this survey and wrote my next blog

What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
finishing this survey and writing my next blog

Do you like your life as of now?

Last thing you purchased?
My Tuesday Night 6 pack - but last night it was a 12pack. I splurged.

Where are you right now, and how do you feel about where you are?
well I'm still at home, in the computer room, and I feel fine
blah blah blah blah LEONARD BERNSTEIN

May 28, 2008


Rules of Marriage-Spraying Febreeze on clothes & tossing them in the dryer does not equate doing laundry. But it is an excuse for pummelings


Rules of Marriage - "Thread count" (whether you know what it is or not), IS important and IS more meaningful than any sports score.


How to Compliment A Man - On the day when you force him into a tuxedo. Tell him he looks sharp, like James Bond, suave with a hint of danger


Being away from a computer for a day, is liberating. Yet when you're ready to write something, it takes 2 days to get back the typing groove


Summer was here and we had frost. Now who is STILL complaining about global warming?


ORIGINALLY POSTED AS A COMMENT ON "Saturday May 3, 2008, 11:19 PM" It was a decent little comment that I decided to save it for those days when I am feeling a bit on the lazy side. This is one of those days.

Hello again. Here I am to leave yet another "epic" comment.

I want to say that it's not proper dating that has gone the way of the dinosaurs, but all forms of courtesy, respect and polite public behavior. At one time parents raised their sons to be boys around other boys, and to be gentlemen around women.

Even the old TV shows presented this "proper" behavior. The perfect example is Eddie Haskel. He was an ass; everybody knew he was an ass. But he was always on his best behavior when dealing with adults. Sure it was slimy behavior and they saw right through it, but he still followed the rules as did every other boy.

Nowadays, what was once improper behavior is considered normal. You can say and do whatever you want in mixed company and no one bats an eye. This translates to how men and women act towards each other.

So as time goes by, what was once considered improper behavior becomes the current accepted behavior. And this behavior keeps perpetuating in a negative growth trend.

In conclusion no you are not wrong to expect to be asked out on a proper date. But sadly you might have to remind your "potential" that you are a lady, and expect to be treated like one. If they don't understand what you mean...lets hope the curb you kick them to leaves a good bruise.

May 26, 2008


Now those of you that actually know me, know that I'm not a pro-military person. But I do have a respect for those that do choose this way of life. Yes, it is a way of life. It takes someone of a special courage, an unbelievable strength of character and a love for their family, home and friends, to join the military. It takes someone who is afraid but won't and didn't let that stand in his or her way. It takes ultimate sacrifice, for those that laid it all on the line, because whether they lived or died, they're the ones who pay the price of freedom. I may never know all of you, but to you all I do say "thank you"! To the families and friends of these courageous individuals, my prayers are with you.

To those who never came home... a moment of silence.


This is for those who fell, and never stood again,

Those who chose bravery over timidity,

Who chose liberty over constraint,

Who stood for freedom,

Who knew the cost,

Who made that choice,

Who ultimately paid the price,

This is for you,

You are not forgotten.

You are remembered.

In every flag that waves,

With every word voiced,

With every freedom we hold dear,

This is for you.

Thank You,

We miss you,

We remember you,


May 25, 2008


I went five months without smoking read about my slight lapse in judgment.


I wanted a cigarette.

I have for the past 2 weeks.

Yesterday, I finally broke down.

I bought a pack.

Pall Mall Light 100's.

That used to be my brand.

Sat in the car.

Contemplated having one.

Finally, I said, "It's an experiment."

I opened the pack.

I took out a cigarette.

I lit it.

I smoked a cigarette.

It was awful.

The need to vomit was overpowering.

Did not vomit.

Later that day...

for some reason unknown to me

I did it again.

I took out another cigarette.

I lit it.

I smoked another cigarette.

It was awful.

The need to vomit was still overpowering.

Did not vomit.

I actually had a few more.

It was in the interest of science.


I have a headache that won't quit.

My throat hurts.

I feel nauseous.

My mouth tastes like the cats shat in there.

The pornado sanctum stinks.

My clothes stink.

My hair smells like bar room floor.

Overall I think that experiment went quite badly.

That officially cures my want of cigarette.


I'm amused that twitter is overworked. I'm not amused that I can't read what I've missed. I love the twitter. I hate the twitter.

May 24, 2008


I can't be neglecting my dirty knees, and my whoring duties.


So is it bad form for it to be Noon on a Saturday, and to be getting drunk?? Just being curious?


‘Terminator Salvation’ Site Goes Live + Synopsis


Originally posted as a comment on Posted on "Wednesday April 23, 2008, 3:55 PM"

It was a decent little comment that I decided to save it for those days when I am feeling a bit on the lazy side. This is one of those days.

I am not an intelligent TV viewer, and despite my own delusions I'm not that intelligent to begin with (if you read my words, that comes across pretty well).

I stopped watching the news regularly on TV about 19 years ago. I will sit and read a book when Sue decides to watch the news and on occasion I will glance up at the TV.

Usually resulting in my heart getting torn from my chest. I'm tired of seeing tragedy, horror, hatred and indifference in my community and the world around me displayed at 5PM, 6PM and 10PM. And then again at 2AM for the rebroadcast and at 5AM and 6AM.

Or I get some scare tactics/shock journalism, telling me that me or my own could be dying right now.

My wife enjoys the History Channel, TLC, Discovery, Style, HGTV and the news.

I'm the Cartoon Network, Sci-fi, Nickelodeon, WWE and Showtime Network kind of guy. I want to be entertained by shows where the good guys win and the bad guys lose. I want to see the happy ending, the long lost lovers/family/friends reunited. So I go for sheer entertainment when it comes to TV.

At least once a day my wife will mention some news related issue. Then she has to bring me up to date on that particular issue. Normally it's some awful tragedy that, in all honesty, I would have lived my life just fine not knowing about it. Other times it just pisses me off or worse. It adds fuel to the simple fact that I really don't like 80% of the people that inhabit my planet.

I'm not an intelligent TV viewer, but I'm very OK with that. I never claimed to be intelligent.


Just kidding...I just wanted to create a dramatic moment.


YOU can't shut off IM services....oh wait..whO do I technically IM? just the whole freakin world!!!

May 23, 2008


L.A.Guns - Never Enough that's right, 90's sleaze rock. Feel the dirty!!!


OK...who has issues with the FLOCK browser being so unstable and crashing even when NOTHING is going on??


Is there a demand for catgut anymore? Like maybe on the black market? Of course when the wife reads this, the brutal pummeling will commence


Rules of Marriage - Even though they are cats and cats are animals, the wife will give THEM free reign over you and not the other way around


I know cats are evil & I'd really love for evil to take one day off a week, because this 3 hours of interrupted sleep bullshit is killing me


Man I love this song. I was at Summerfest when L.A Guns and London Quireboys played. It honestly ranks in the top 10 awesome rock shows I have seen.


More On Marvel’s "Thor, Iron Man 2 & Avengers"

May 22, 2008


Damn I thought I was being a good whore guess I'm just slacking now


To stop spreading STD's we should give them evil sounding names like, "a punch to the face", "curb stomp" or "now you have a broken hand".


Why do STD's have such pretty sounding names? Chlamydia sounds like a flower, syphilis could be a fabric and herpes sounds like a party game


You Tube is God's waiting room for everything that's no longer cool; but wants to die. And we are to selfish to let it go towards the light.


Maybe someday we'll hear of that thing called originality.


‘Iron Man’ Writers To Reinvent ‘Highlander’ Series


My wife says that I have focussed on women too much in my previous entries. So to be as fair as possible, here I go...

(the following may seem a bit familiar, heh)

I was a latchkey kid. I pretty much took care of myself, and the few times I did have babysitters, they were usually the upstairs neighbors, and they just looked in on me every once in a while.

Now with that said, (it takes me a while to get to my original thought, it's like taking the scenic route on a trip...or getting lost, umm...heheh uh you get my point) I was raised by T.V..

With an ounce of pride and a pound of shame I can say that I probably logged more T.V. time then "Lois and Clark" fans. You should be able to get this reference. Sheesh.

So let's do the math here.

Lots of T.V. time
action, action, action
impressionable young mind
the most memorable men of my formative years from television and film.

In no particular order the original top 10

1. Captain America

This was one of the very first comic books I ever owned.

Although Captain America was very cool it took this to make him "stellar"

all be it, I never did understand how a flimsy shield could stop bullets.

2. Superman

Superman takes up a few slots for different reasons. The Super Friends was one of my raison d'etre on Saturday mornings. And come on ...he can FLY!!!

3. Superman played by George Reeves

Yeah I know. I never understood why he could be shot at but would always duck when they threw the gun at him, but on Sunday morning when my mom was cleaning the bar this helped pass the time. With a bar hamburger and a Coke to drink, this was Sunday for me. This paragraph will be repeated in a little bit, just so you're warned.

I still know this word for word, which kind of freaked out my wife. I was channel flipping and now we get this "retro" T.V. station and they were playing an episode of The Adventures of Superman, and I regurgitated the entire intro along with some of the catch phrases. She looked at me, mouth agape and asked "Did you just watch this or something?" I said "Nope, I just remember it all, and before you ask, it's been at least 15 maybe closer to 20 years since I saw an episode."

"You can remember all that but you can't remember to defrost something for dinner. That brain is wasted in you, you know that." - real quote

4. Superman played by Christopher Reeve
This iconic figure will forever be etched into the brain of a five year old boy. This character was everything I wanted to be.

It seems so sad that in todays world, there really is no room for the clear cut "good guy." That all of todays "heroes" need some dark side to them or they're the reluctant hero.

The idea of a good guy being the good guy seems so antiquated todays. What a shame

This made a boy look up to the sky

and dream a little bigger

5. The Six Million Dollar Man "Steve Austin" played by Lee Majors
To be honest I was about to add the image I found, but then I figured some of you might skip the video...and you really need to hear and see this video. It's scary funny.

OK who didn't want to be bionic? C'mon you even get the "Na na nananana" sound effects.

6. Shazam

I just wanted to be Captain Marvel because he was tall strong and could fly.

Yeah I's kind of a theme for me isn't it?

7. The Lone Ranger - ONLY Clayton Moore.

His replacement sucked and the "Legend of the Lone Ranger" movie sucked so much ass it's almost qualifies for gay porn.

But anyway, on Sunday morning when my mom was cleaning the bar this helped pass the time. With a bar hamburger and a Coke to drink, this was Sunday for me. This paragraph has been repeated.

They were on in this four T.V. show block.

To this day the William Tell Overture is synonymous with The Lone Ranger. Well to me at least. This still gets me all riled up. Heh.

It took me a long tine to NOT call this the Lone Ranger Theme song.

8. Han Solo played by Harrison Ford

He flew the Millennium Falcon.

His best friend was Chewbacca the Wookie.

He has the coolest blaster in the movie.

AND he wore a vest.

Add it up any way you want to boys and girls, no matter what the answer will always be "COOL."

This is hands down my favorite scene from Star Wars.

This used to be my "error stop" sound but I had to change it because it lasts forever

9. Tarzan played by Ron Ely
He had a monkey, and we all know that monkeys are funny.

He swung on a vine.

He wrestled with animals.

He understood what they could say.

He was barefoot and he never stubbed his toes.

Most importantly...THE TARZAN YELL

THE MIGHTY TARZAN YELL..was also a sound for the mighty pornado control box.

However it was not a good idea to be the sound every time I got a new message for AIM. That got annoying really really quick.

10. Doctor Who (fourth) played by Tom Baker

This show was absolutely brilliant. A tour de force for this young man.

Add a Kooky main star - The Doctor
a time machine/spaceship - The TARDIS
a hot wild chick - Leela
and a robotic dog - K-9

you get hours upon hours of enjoyment.

I wanted a K-9 so badly, that when my cousins and I played "make believe I chose to be the Doctor, so I could have a K-9

Unlike the women, there were really no honorable mentions. These were the guys that I wanted to be and emulate. When were kids we were them, so only the best made it into "play." Again things change after I turned 13 though.

May 21, 2008


My whoring moment of the day, wow these knee pads are awesome.


Sony has rights to Flash Gordon w/ plans to make a live-action movie. Breck Eisner is to direct/executive produce w/ Neal Moritz producing.


Listening to Amy Winehouse right now. It's too bad she has issues, she's pretty good! This is brought to you by the man on the cutting edge


DAMN...I feel like the Pink Ranger on a porn set...used, abused, and wanting more Mother F'N zords


Some children, when growing up, have this aversion towards the opposite sex. You might remember the days of cooties and boy/girl germs. Well, of all the things I endured growing up, this wasn't one of them.

I knew as a kid that women were different, but when raised by a single mom, the notion of cooties and germs seems pretty irrelevant. So as the other boys were running from the girls...I wasn't putting that much effort into it.

I mean what happens if you run too fast? A quandary I, personally, did not want to know the outcome of.

I mention that so I can explain that I was a latchkey kid. I pretty much took care of myself, and the few times I did have babysitters, they were usually the upstairs neighbors, and they just looked in on me every once in a while.

Now with that said, (it takes me a while to get to my original thought, it's like taking the scenic route on a trip...or getting lost, umm...heheh uh you get my point) I was raised by T.V..

With an ounce of pride and a pound of shame I can say that I probably logged more T.V. time then "Luke and Laura" fans. If you don't get the reference, by all that is good and holy, GOOGLE IT! Sheesh.

So let's do the math here.

Lots of T.V. time
not much aversion to the female or female form
impressionable young mind
the most memorable women of my formative years from television and film.

In no particular order the original top 10

1. Daisy Duke played by Catherine Bach on


2. Diana Prince/Wonder Woman played by Lynda Carter on


3. Wilma Deering played by Erin Grey on


4. Princess Leia Organa played by Carrie Fisher on


5. Joanna Marie "Jo" Polniaczek played by Nancy McKeon on


6. Mary Amelia Ingalls played by Melissa Sue Anderson on


7. Vicki Stubing played by Jill Whelan on


8. Christine 'Moose' McGlade played by herself on


9. Kiri played by Tanya Roberts on


yes I used the "safe"image. Although I can still picture the image that forever has engraved her to memory.

10. Jill Munroe played by Farrah Fawcett on





Jennifer Marlowe played by Loni Anderson "WKRP in Cincinnati" 1978-1982

Cassiopeia played by Laurette Spang "Battlestar Galactica"1978-1979

Athena played by Maren Jensen "Battlestar Galactica"1978-1979

Princess Ardala played by Pamela Hensley "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century"1979-1981

Marie Osmond - herself "Donny and Marie Show"1976-1979

Susan Bradford Stockwell played by Susan Richardson "Eeight is Enough"1977-1981

Elizabeth Bradford played by Connie Needham "Eight is Enough"1977-1981

Nancy Bradford played by Dianne Kay "Eight is Enough"1977-1981

Jamie sommers played by Lindsay Wagner "The Bionic Woman"1976-1978

Charlie's Angels played by Kate Jackson, Jaclyn Smith,

Cheryl Ladd,

Shelley Hack"Charlie's Angels"1976-1981

May 20, 2008


My whore moment, Mr Deville, Please, THIS is my good side


Rules of Marriage - It's not that she rules with an iron fist, but more the fact that she rules with an iron skillet; and a wicked back hand


Paris Hilton has been an amazing influence on the world. The classy and elegant woman can be seen in all parts of the world. From the most fabulous beaches...

to the Red Carpets of Hollywood.

Her actions have had a resounding effect on women everywhere. The alluring socialite and her behavior has been the shot heard around the world. Always being on the cutting edge of cool, she has been an obvious influence

on performers and singers like Jamie Lynn,

Britney Spears,

and Cristina Aguilera.

She doesn't just influence the young girls of America anymore. Her extravagant behavior has influenced the entire world. Her influence can even be found in nature.

And everyone is trying to cash in on the good work of Paris Hilton. Despite popular belief, Paris did not do all her own stunts in her movie. She did have a stunt double. Who is now trying to cash in on Paris-mania.

So this beautiful and elegant woman is truly an inspiration to us all.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

May 19, 2008


Rules of Marriage - Yes it was you, don't argue, just accept it.


Woke up with tortilla chip crumbs in my hair. I don't eat tortilla chips in bed. With "salsa and tortilla chip" breath Sue says "wasn't her"


ORIGINALLY POSTED AS A COMMENT ON "Monday April 21, 2008, 11:59 PM" 

It was a decent little comment that I decided to save it for those days when I am feeling a bit on the lazy side.  This is one of those days.

I actually try hats on all the time. Sadly in my 35 years of existence I have only found 4 hats that look good on me. A batman bucket hat, a Green Bay Packers Stocking Cap, a retro White Sox hat (kind of looks like the "Black Sox" era hat) and this black floppy cowboy hat that I got at Target.

Which I tend to wear when the mod strikes me. It's not often...but there are those days when I just want to say "my drummer is drumming pa rum pum pum pum, and for some reason everyone else's drummer just took a break" kind of moment.

In my personal and pretty irrelevant opinion, as long if you "own your look" it's OK by me. As long as you don't look like everyone else around you.

There's nothing sadder than "being original" while looking like everyone else.
Blogged with the Flock Browser

May 18, 2008


Remake Treatment for Red Dawn and Robocop http://www.hollywoodreporte...


I realize how far out of the loop I must be to give an opinion on a movie that came out a year ago. That's me all right, on the cutting edge


POTC-At Worlds End is playing on Starz & I enjoyed it the 1st time, but I've watched it twice now & I'm not happy. The movie kinda sucks now


How cool is "Steam Punk Star Wars Action figures?"

If you have to ask...then you're not really a geek. And no amount of explanation will ever suffice.

Twitter Thoughts

I finished watching Pirates of the Caribbean - Curse of the Black Pearl...again. That movie is still fun. Now I'm watching Dead Man's Chest

May 17, 2008

Twitter Thoughts

WOW, I went an entire day away from pornado central...WOW


This is just a beautiful song. With such a tragic story.

May 16, 2008

Twitter Thoughts

Have you ever realized that impending doom really has it's own sound? I just did.

Twitter Thoughts

Uh...yeah...I gots nuffin.

Twitter Thoughts Lindsey Lohan may be gay, huh? Umm...does anyone really care anymore?

Twitter Thoughts

Should I be appalled or praised for using restraint when hearing a teenager say "You old fucks are killing the planet!"?

Twitter Thoughts

It's my whoring moment of the day. They said it would only get easier, http://c-o-a-c-e-archives.b... and I believe they were right


To be very honest my wife and I don't really share to many common television interests.  We tolerate some of each others shows, but for the most part, we would prefer to watch movies.  We're both movie junkies.  And as movie junkies we both really enjoy INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO I especially love the questions at the end of the show.  Well here's my answers to those questions...well at least for today...

1. What is your favorite word?

2. What is your least favorite word?

3. What turns you on or excites you?

4. What turns you off?
morning alarms

5. What sound or noise do you love?
a baby's laughter

6. What sound or noise do you hate?
a scream of anguish or loss

7. What's your favorite cuss word?
son of a bitch

8. What profession other than yours would you like to do?
Honestly of all the things out there I would have to say writer for the WWE.

9. What profession would you least want to do?
President-if you do a good job they kill you, if you do a bad job they re-elect you

10. If heaven exists, what would you like to hear god say when you walk through the pearly gates?
"WOW, even after everything you did you made it?  Heh.  I've really got to raise my standards."
Blogged with the Flock Browser

May 15, 2008

Twitter Thoughts

I believe no one should ever have to go searching for reasons to drink to excess.The reasons should come to you quick and ready to implement


OMG this is just too funny. You can open your own franchise too.

You order a pizza or 2 or 3 and you get a Porn DVD under the pizza to watch.

OMG that's just too funny.

Twitter Thoughts

Can one be into hip hop even if you hate, bitches, ho's and the repeated 'yeah uh yeah'? Or, is this all there is to the hip hop generation?

May 14, 2008

Twitter Thoughts

I want to be the most successful ladies man on the short bus. That's right folks, the Casanova with the best parking privileges!

Twitter Thoughts

Just read an article that an Australian man seat belted his 30 pack of beer, while letting his kid sit on the floor. He was fined $750. WOW!

Twitter Thoughts

Hank William Jr. says in a song "hangovers hurt more than they used too." Man oh man, he wasn't kidding at all.

Twitter Thoughts

Rules of Marriage - Hugging you significant other while dropping DEFCON 5 ass is not romantic, nor will it lead to romantic ideas or actions

May 13, 2008

Twitter Thoughts

Rules of Marriage - Although a Dutch Oven is funny. It is not appropriate foreplay.

Twitter Thoughts

I also realize that I can't use proper grammar either. It's like the double whammy of being raised in UNcoolsville. Not funny or Grammary.

Twitter Thoughts

WOW, after spending the last 20 minutes reading a lot of peoples Twitters, the sad realizations hits me...I am SO not funny or clever. :(

Twitter Thoughts

Bathe or Shower regularly; there are some odors a body can make, that shouldn't be made.

Twitter Thoughts

Rules of Marriage - Just because you can say she's doesn't mean you should.

Twitter Thoughts

WOW, the transition from internet fool to blog whore is going smoothly. How cool is that? VERY COOL. http://c-o-a-c-e-archives.b...


Many many many moons ago I worked at a comic book store...and this was one of those "you got to be kidding me !" moments

Phone Rings
Me - HI, The Comic Book Store, how can I help you?

Customer - You sell comic books?

Me - Yes sir, is there one you’re looking for?

Customer - Yes, I want one by Arsenio Hall?

Me - Excuse me?

Customer - I want the book by comic Arsenio Hall.

Me - I’m sorry sir, we carry comic books, like Superman, Spiderman and Spawn.

Customer - OK, BYE!

30 minutes passes

Customer walks in the store

Me - Hi, How ya doing?

Customer - Fine. (walks around the store for about 2-3 minutes)

Me - Anything I can help you find?

Customer - Yes, I called and there should be a book waiting for me.

Me - (thinking we have 3 stores maybe he called one of them) What book are you looking for.

Customer - The one by Arsenio Hall.

Me - Excuse me?

Customer - I want the book by comic Arsenio Hall.

Me - I’m sorry sir, we carry comic books, like Superman, Spiderman and Batman. (as I hold them up)

Customer - OK, BYE! Stupid store!!

Blogged with the Flock Browser

May 12, 2008

Twitter Thoughts

This is my FrankenHooker "Wanna Date!!!" moment... Damn, I'm too cheap.

OLD AND NEW...again

“Actually, I...this may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about...when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me.”  George W. Bush

I guess there are some new people reading this, and becoming the blog whore that I never meant to become (but transitioning very very well), I guess I should reintroduce myself. So...

Hello. I'm Jose. I'm 35, I have been married for 2 year and 16 days. I have been with my wife Season (which is a nickname that came about because I accidentally combines her first and middle name in one tender moment) for 3 years and 16 days. We, basically meaning my wife, have 3 cats (which is my way of saying 3 to many). We fight. We laugh.  Were about as normal dysfunctional  as normal dysfunctional gets. We are all these things and so much more.

I work at a job I hate, doing something I loathe, but I like my boss, sometimes, and I like my co-workers, as long as I'm not "working" with them. But since all things must change, I'll be looking for new employment, because the hating and the loathing are far exceeding the "likes".

I blog because it's cheaper than therapy.

I blog because it does help clear my mind from all the usual white noise that's in my head.

I blog because I like to write.  The more I write the better I get...hopefully.

I am an opinionated man, but I won't share them all, just the ones I feel I need to express.

It's all pretty subjective.

I probably spend to much time on the web, and nowhere near the same amount of time checking my e-mails...which I should probably check soon.

I guess everything else you need to know will come about as I write it.

But sadly since linear thought also eludes me most days, depending on my mood and attention span, I can be found in a few places.

where I waste way too much time.
I'm here a lot

where I try and find some cool music...well at least cool to me.
Not here as often as I'd like to be.

where I try and find cool music videos and videos of days gone by...well at least cool to me.
Not here as often as I'd like to be.

some of my more recent photos yet my camera decided that it had enough of this cruel world, and took a much needed rest...albeit a permanent one.
Not here as often as I'd like to be (until the digi cam situation is fixed)

where I waste way too much time.  This is the place where I have been writing streams of conscious (good or bad).  Since I'm only allowed a few characters, I have also been using it as a writing exercise.
I'm here a lot

Usually it's just to leave a "thought" that's not quite long enough for a blog but too long for a twitter

I'm here regularly.

oddly I have this and I have no clue what to use it for...maybe I'll just do reviews here.

I'm here regularly.

The current home of my collection of crap I have written over the years, but the web address is kind of a bitch to type, so I'll be moving it sometime in the near future.
I'm here a lot.

Watch Movies dot Net
Where I spend some time watching and commenting on movies.
I'm here regularly.

WOW...yuppers...I really need a life.

So for those just joining...

Hello, hi, howdy and hola...I hope I am as funny and interesting as I am in my head...

and for those who have already been reading this...

Hello, hi, howdy, hola, and I'm sorry I'm not as funny and interesting as I am in my head, but please don't tell the newbies.

OK, we'll get back on track tomorrow.
Blogged with the Flock Browser

Twitter Thoughts

I have some people following me. Maybe I should move Nevada to start a brothel.

PS That sound you hear is my wife kicking the snot out of me

May 11, 2008

Twitter Thoughts

I am sitting here & I noticed that most people who twitter do so sans protective gear. Unsafe twitter practices cause unwanted twitterlings.

Twitter Thoughts

Hot fudge sundaes are very yummy. Toothpaste on the other hand is not. I wonder if there's a market for hot fudge sundae flavored toothpaste

Twitter Thoughts

The main difference between flying and falling is how much grace is involved.
Flying=walk away with grace.
Falling=limp away with no dignity

Twitter Thoughts

Whoring myself out, who knew internalizing shame would be so easy http://c-o-a-c-e-archives.b...

Twitter Thoughts

Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children. HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY


Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children and they're waiting for you.


There is something greatly satisfying knowing that out there in this wide crazy world is another person just like you, who gets the joke too

May 10, 2008


You have a mastery of words that inspire the heart, that fills the wings of angles so that they may soar higher and fill my eyes with tears.


My fair lady, it took a single reading to surmise the meaning of thy statement. Confusing to a mere bystander, but I'm not a mere bystander.


I'm hoping to see more naked bottoms, tops and all else in between. I'm merely a man with thoughts of sin and of the flesh. And I remain so.


We will talk again and soon my dear. Until then, I will continue to feel honored and blessed to know you.


A real life fleshie (you know, someone who I did not meet in the cyber world) friend of mine asked me why I have gone through so many email addresses. After I wrote him back, I thought to myself

"Self...lookie here you now have another entry!"

So here you go... a story none of you wanted to know...

My email address always reflected something about me. I have had a few in my cyber lifetime. Most of the names takes the things about me that for some feeble reason makes sense.

Nightgaunt = a faceless leather winged creature who lives in the "Dream Lands" created by H.P. Lovecraft. I figured that highly appropriate since online we are all pretty much faceless

Phulespride = too foolish to care what little pride I had, yet too much pride to stop being the fool.

SaintnSyynner = the polar opposites of my personality which I have been known to portray often.

WhiskeyConfessions = my "needing" to be consuming whenever I write a poem or a story because that's the only way I could be honest enough to say what I had on my mind.

ConfessionsOfACerealEater = ok...that one was just because I had the blog...and it made sense to me.

Impulse4lifewwfd (wwfd= what would Flash do...) = and that one was about doing everything and never thinking of the consequences, which the character of Impulse (a DC Comics character) used to do.

SpyderY2J = was one of my favorites. It incorporated my love of comics (Spiderman and Spider Jerusalem), of wrestling (Chris 'Y2J' Jericho) and my name J (Jose).

So one day, I was checking my emails and I realized that I'm not any of those things and, yet I am every bit of all of them. So after spending a few days trying to come up with a name, I realized that good or bad, I am still me, and that "me" isn't as bad as I thought he was.
This "me" still has a woman who for some reason loved me enough to be my wife.

This "me" had a very close friendship with the person who inspired me to start writing a blog. (I hope you're doing well.)

Just in case you all didn't realize it, being all "Mr. Subtle Ninja Warrior" here, I'm talking about the things that have made me tick over the last few years.

So I decided to start slowly killing off my plethora of email addresses, and in the end just leaving what has been there (albeit hidden from my eyes) all along.

That no matter what happens and where life takes me...I am still me.

Now if you only knew what my email addy was that would make a million times more sense.

May 9, 2008


I'm giving up my manhood. It's sad to say but I have to give it up. I just finished watched 27 Dresses, while my wife slept, & I like it. :(


Dickmobile and Kenny Loggins. Today is shaping to be the greatest twitter day ever. Thanx God. Now will you forgive the 27 Dresses faux pas.


another self styled E-minor

I don't care about seat belts. I don't care about how many lives they save. I sure as hell don't like to be told I need to wear one. And mostly I am pissed off that, of all the pressing issues in our wonderful nation, passing a seatbelt law takes precedents over them. Thank goodness that my wearing a seatbelt will help this nation get back on it's feet and that multi billion dollar deficit thing will just go away on it's own.

I just don't like wearing them.

I hate the fact that somebody out there lost a loved a one, and through that loss has taken away my right to choose and decide what is best for me.

My wearing of "the seatbelt" does not improve my driving. As a matter of fact it annoys the hell out of me. So it sure as hell affects my driving and, I really hope this would go without saying, not for the better.

What affects my driving the most is when a passenger in my car, tells me what they think I should be doing.

I hate the fact that people get so self righteous about this.

"Geez Jose' seatbelts save lives, you know."
"That may be true but it's my car and I choose not to wear one."
"No really it's true, the DOT and local law enforcement say so."
"So let's put your theory to the test? Let's see what will get you hurt faster, telling me what to do while you are a passenger in a ton and a half of steel and plastic that I am in control of, getting very pissed off at you? Or..."
"or what?"
"Or me pummeling you into next week, because YOU ARE A PASSENGER IN MY CAR TELLING ME WHAT I SHOULD BE DOING. Just because you have the freedom of speech, does not mean you should exercise that freedom...WHEN YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL OF THE FINAL OUTCOME! ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU KNOW WHERE I STAND ON THAT TOPIC, dumbass."

Now while the seatbelt may or may not save lives, I can practically guarantee that pissing off the owner of the vehicle while he or she is driving it...will not lead to a happy ending.

I think of this all as "God's" plan. If we are supposed to die in a fiery wreck because I didn't wear a seatbelt, then as it was said let it be done.


It's not love that makes a marriage work. What makes a marriage work is the fact that you are married to a sugar momma, oh and a lot of fear

May 8, 2008


Sue said my death will be quick if I ever rode a Harley. I dreamt I was riding an Aquaman themed Harley. In my dreams, I am an Easy Rider :)


I know I should never watch the movie "Teeth" again, but it's so wrong, that in it's wrongness the movie is pure gold. Vagina Denete OH SNAP


Sometimes you just have to go


May 7, 2008


ME -Here's a question, If monkeys throw flying monkeys drop bombs?

HER -I Love You, you dorkimus prime

ME -and I'm the geek? Heh!!


In a dream, I brought awareness to the plight of the spoiled rich kid. I woke up & punched myself in the face. It was the right thing to do.


I just learned they want to remake Short Circuit and Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure

That's just too much 80's crap for one night.

I feel dirty again mother, no matter how much I scrub, I still feel dirty.


"You know the directions?"

"Yes, I know how to get there."

"OK, so how do we get there?"

"We drive."
That response resulted in my pummeling.


People read what I write. But still no one has contacted me so that they can make my life into a multi-million dollar multi movie franchise.

May 6, 2008


i only wear clothes with logos for products that i use and endorse for example, you don’t see me wearing a trojan condom hat - dave carnie


I believe that had Mike Tyson been born a country music fan, he'd have written a song and called it "I Just Kissed Your Face With My Fist."

May 5, 2008


That throbbing you feel in your head isn't a hangover. It's the devil's penis. He's skull fucking you because that was his food cake you ate





"The holiday, which has been celebrated in California continuously since 1863, is virtually ignored in Mexico."

Commercial interests in the United States have capitalized on the
celebration, advertising Mexican products and services, with an
emphasis on beverages, foods, and music.

So here you go...

happy cinco de mayo

Free Myspace Avatars @

May 4, 2008


Yup I watched a movie called Wrestlemaniac...

I must now go wash for I feel dirty...oh so dirty...