Jul 16, 2009

TOP 10 VILLAINS

AUTHOR'S NOTE
In this entry I am talking about fictional characters in comic books. The feelings expressed in this blog are only directed to fictional characters in comic books. I am very much opposed to the real life villains that do these things in the real world. I think it's pretty sad that I would have to write this type of introduction, but with the way the world is, I don't want to see myself on the evening news trying to defend my words about fictional characters. Thank You.
END AUTHOR'S NOTE

A little while ago I did my Top 10 favorite superheroes.

But the hero is only as good as his opposition.

His nemesis.

His villain.

I have my favorite heroes, but I LOVE a good villain. I'm not talking about the ones that grow a conscience and in the end the right thing.

I'm not talking about the ones who are out to make it rich by blackmailing, robbing banks or holding something for ransom.

I'm talking about the ones who want to burn the city just so they can see the flames.

The ones who cause mayhem, pandemonium and turmoil.

The ones who want to conquer the city, the Earth or the universe, because they can and because they feel entitled to it.

The ones who blow up hospitals just because it's fun or the ones who just want to kill the hero.

The villain has to always be the polar opposite of the hero.

Example - Batman is discipline and deduction, while the Joker is chaos and madness.

The villain has to be stronger/better than the hero.

Example - Lex Luthor is an evil genius, wealthy and has more overall resources then Superman.

I always think the villains who are evil or crazy made the most compelling characters.

So here's my favorite villains...



(all the character descriptions were written by someone else. I just happened to agree with everything they said and couldn't find a better way to say what they did, so I just kept them as is.)


10. Harley Quinn



She is not the strongest of Batman's villains and she is not necessarily the most malevolent. But she is
quick to turn on the crazy, and even quicker to please her Mr. J (for those who don't know Mr J is her pet name for the Joker). That combination alone makes her a constant threat Harley Quinn is unpredictable yet most comfortable in the role of Joker's misunderstood number two.


9. Saint of Killers



Once, the Saint of Killers was just a man. After serving in the Confederate Army - he was feared for his mercilessness
on the battlefield - the grizzled man became a bounty hunter in the West. It was there that he met a woman who cracked his harsh exterior. The two made a life together and had a child.

But this isn't a story with a happy ending. The woman and child fall ill and his attempts to save them are foiled by a gang of outlaws.

Driven to rage by the death of his family, the man slaughters the outlaws, kills an innocent bystander, but runs out of bullets as he confronts the gang's leader. The leader kills him and the man is sent to Hell, where he is ultimately banished by the Devil - his hate causes Hell to literally freeze over. The Angel of Death allows him to return to Earth on the condition that he undertakes the duty of collecting the souls of those who die by violence.

Now he's the new face of Death, and woe be it to anyone who crosses his path.


8. Apocalypse



En Sabah Nur sees himself as the original mutant and therefore its rightful leader and ruler. Apocalypse is one of the
world’s most powerful mutants, having the ability to change his molecular structure. He also appears to be immortal. In more than one alternate future, Apocalypse has ruled the earth. He continues toward this goal today, choosing the right time to awaken and reveal himself.


7. Ra's al Ghul



Ra’s al Ghul has been an iconic Batman super villain. His purpose is to cleanse the earth and restore it to an eden-like
state. The problem is, that most of humanity needs to die in the process. Ra’s has lived for an incredibly long time, beating death with the use of his Lazarus Pit. His incredible intelligence and abilities in martial arts and swordsmanship makes Ra’s a formidable opponent, worthy the title of super villain.


6. Galactus



The world-eater. When Galactus shows up, he becomes everyone’s problem. With a slew of cosmic powered henchmen at his side, Galactus is the one villain to beat. If you don’t, the result isn’t world domination, but world destruction. Galactus has destroyed countless worlds and killed billions of beings. His hunger will never end and therefore, neither will his destruction.


5. Doomsday



Doomsday is the only super villain to have successfully killed Superman.


4. Dr. Doom



The ruler of Latveria is one of Marvel comic’s greatest foes. His intellect and master of the mystical arts makes this man one of the most powerful beings in the Marvel universe. His thirst for world domination is only rivaled by his hunger to see Reed Richards dead and humiliated. Victor Von Doom is truly a villain you don’t want to trifle with.


3. Joker



The Joker is mad. Maybe that is what is so appealing about this character. Pain, morality, logical thinking, and every other
normal human trait go out the window when one thinks of the Joker. Combine his sanity with his penchant ability with toxic chemicals, and you have the makings of an unpredictable madman that can bring those around him to their knees.


2. Lex Luthor



Genius, ex-president, criminal mastermind, businessman, sociopath. Superman’s number one bad guy is right near the top of the list of the all-time best super villains. While Lex doesn’t have magical powers, super strength, or any of the other things that make up the common super villain, he more than makes up this with his superior intellect and utter ruthlessness. Don’t get on his bad side. If you do, you can bet you won’t last long.


1. Lucifer



Lucifer's appeal as a villain is that he doesn't brow beat readers over the head with his villainy. His intellect is matched
by his ability to manipulate creation into what he imagines. Any being that can marshal demons to battle angels and still find time to stir humanity from indifference is a threat no one can ignore. Yet somehow, Lucifer's ability to stay below the radar and simultaneously impact mankind is both a gift and a curse.


Currently listening:

The Silence Of The Lambs: The Original Motion Picture Score
Release date: 1991-02-05

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Pinks All Out on the Speed channel, is a misleading title for a TV show. I'm just saying is all.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

If you're playing texas hold 'em against yourself and you know you cheated, you just can't remember who did it, how and when it happened.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Why is that people lie in personal ads? I mean is it really a good idea to try and get someones attention with a lie. Just seems wrong to me

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Oh by the way, if you know any desperate women with loose morals, please send them my way. I would appreciate that very much. Thank You.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I want to walk into a room and, yell "Where's the white women at?!?!" I don't have a good reason why other than to make myself giggle.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I'm wondering why Wal-mart is a trending topic? Did something happen that I need to know? Is there treasure like in Raiders of the lost Ark?

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I wonder, who actually reads the useless things I type. You could be making the world a better place, and instead you read my tripe? THANKS!

Jul 15, 2009

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Ahhh nutz...deez nutz...corn nutz...nutz and boltz...peanutz...nutz n honey...I think I am going nutz :(

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I'm also a lazy tweeter...

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I'm a lazy blogger...

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Housework is best left to house elves...

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Well, it is unfortunate, but I must rejoin the analog world and walk away from this digital domain. Be well, be free, be happy!

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Have you ever noticed that most of the things you want are just a little out of reach, but all the things you need are already in your hands

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Good afternoon twitter, friends, followers, and bots. I am Jose and these, sadly, these are my thoughts.

KISS

I went for a walk this morning for no reason at all, other than it was dark and very quiet. While I was strolling around town, I started thinking about "that kiss" and it made me happy.

Not the rock band KISS, but THE (to join lips in respect, affection, love, passion) kiss.

Not your first kiss either, but the kiss that all the ones that have come before and after are judged against. And they all never measure up.

The one that made your heart race and made time stop. It clearly defined how long forever is, and how it would never be long enough.

The kiss that made everyone else in the room disappear leaving only you two. It fills your soul with pure pleasure, hope and a longing you never knew you had.

It's the kiss that you know will change your life forever.

And it does.

I was thinking about that kiss this morning. That once in a lifetime perfect moment when every raw emotion erupts with anticipation and your whole body tingles with electricity. Where your body, mind and soul and their body, mind and soul converge together for this brief instant. That during this moment there is no you or them. Just an entity of unbridled joy and happiness.

One single being.

An eternity passes, as one.

Until your lips part.

The world materializes and you feel that emptiness again. That you are no longer complete. The ache that comes when your lips separate. How much it hurts being apart...again.

Before that perfect kiss you were blissfully unaware.

Before that moment, happiness came in knowing you existed.

Now the disappointment comes crashing into you knowing you were never more alive then you were in those two seconds.

I went for a walk this morning for no reason at all, other than it was dark and very quiet. While I was strolling around town, I started thinking about "that kiss" and it made me sad.


Currently listening:

Stay
Release date: 2006-11-07

Jul 14, 2009

TWITTER THOUGHTS

It's Tuesday, I'm on my last diet Coke, out of Red Bull and only 3 cigarettes left. This is not looking good. Not looking good day at all.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I don't know who my grandfather was; I am much more concerned to know what his grandson will be. -- Abraham Lincoln

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

Jul 13, 2009

TWITTER THOUGHTS

back into the house. I still haven't seen her today. I believe with the utmost certainty, that I will always have an indoor cat.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I have an indoor cat. Yesterday she went through the garage and walked outside. She went 2 feet from the garage door, car drove by & she ran

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I can't believe July is almost half over...I just last week it felt like Independence Day!

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I think I am burning dinner right now? But I am not sure. I don't usually use the crock pot.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I just read this "People say drugs fuck with your head. Isn't that WHAT they are supposed to do?"...Uh I can't disagree with that at all

THE COMPUTER MONKEY SAYS...2

I am the Computer Monkey



The one called Jose has read the blog I posted yesterday and he was not happy with me. He called it "dumb and childish." He also said that his blogs were not the "proper place for vivid sex acts."

This coming from the same man, and believe me when I say I use that term very very loosely, who had images of celebrity nether regions. For those that might not recollect that drivel...PARIS - ROLE MODEL TO THE WORLD.

With all that said and done I will continue to entertain you with high class humor. Something that dolt does NOT understand.



Which do you like better ham or turkey?

Well since I am in the employ of Jose, the hack, I would have to say I tolerate both.



What does the last txt message you received say?

"Hey idiot...stop texting me and just call!!



Did you watch Arthur when you were young?

That is still in litigation so I must plead the Fifth.




What brand of shampoo do you use?

For all my bathing needs,

(inspired by Jeanine's love of bubble baths)

I use Happy Monkey shampoo



What can you not wait for?

My contract with the walking dung pile to expire.



Do you think your zodiac sign fits your personality?

The year of the monkey, yes



Do you use a flat iron?

Do not put ideas into my head...

I would introduce him to a pummeling of epic...The beauty aid? Oh, my error. No I do not use a flat iron, my hair naturally falls in place.



What size bed do you sleep in?

Does this even remotely look like a bed?

He's an uncultured, rude and uncouth savage.

When is the last time you cried?

Tears of Joy when he fell asleep. Ladies and gentleman and all you loyal readers "Ambien" can help.



Do you have any strange phobias?

I have had dreams that contains leather, discipline and Rosie O'Donnell,



Or that I was adopted by anal probing aliens

(inspired by Pamela in Red's recent vacation)

or maybe these were just movies I had just recently viewed.



Do you have a problem trusting people?

I do now thanks to...



Do you currently like someone right now?

Yes.

Please stop ogling her. It makes her feel uncomfortable.


What is your favorite food?

I know you all expect me to say bananas but you would be incorrect. I actually enjoy all kinds of foods



Which celeb would play you in a movie of your life?

Johnny Depp is a fine actor and I believe he could portray me with realism and class.



Do you work out regularly?

Yes, as a matter of fact I do.



How do you picture yourself 5 years from now?
Still under contract.


Do you like to dance?

Why yes I am a wonderful dancer and I am an instructor there every other Saturday.

There are still some openings available.


What are you going to do now?



and with that I bid you all a fond farewell. It was a wonderful pleasure getting to know each and everyone of you. If you wish to have more of this enlightening and tasteful entertainment, you must make requests for the Computer Monkey.

Bonne nuit mes amis.


Currently listening:

Star Wars Trilogy
By John Williams
Release date: 2004-09-21

TWITTER THOUGHTS

How come when fat people get a sunburn, they don't smell like bacon?

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Why is it that we men have to gloat over each and every victory? We would spend less time on the couch if we'd shut up every once in a while

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Dating-Let's go catch a dinner, a movie and a few drinks. Married-We need to go to Wal-mart, were not buying movies and we have frozen pizza

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Have you ever noticed that on a very good day, Frito's Corn Chips smell just like day old sweaty feet?

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Him-"She's so hot!" Me-"Dude she's an amazon, she can kick your ass!" Him-"I know, just like Xena." Me-"Dude She's so hot!"

TWITTER THOUGHTS

When you're significant other agrees to something you have suggested...be afraid. Be very afraid.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

Have you ever felt like you were punched in the face by the estrogen fist of "shut the hell up you MAN!!!"?

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I have been wondering...would the Jeep be the original SUV?

TWITTER THOUGHTS

It seems funny to me that I have tweeted, twittered and twatted way below budget this weekend.

Jul 12, 2009

THE COMPUTER MONKEY SAYS pt 1

I am the Computer Monkey



The hairless ape called Jose is asleep at this precise moment in chronological measurements.

Since that ignoramus decided to leave all of you wonderful and loyal readers without some embarrassing anecdote. I felt it was imperative that you all have something truly entertaining to read for once. So I, the Computer Monkey will present to each and everyone of you a survey that, for once, that simpleton has no say in. This will be quite enlightening.


What size shoe do you wear?
I am a Computer Monkey. I do not wear shoes. But if I did wear shoes, I would wear "Inch Blue Cheeky Monkey Shoes"



How many Children do you plan on having?
I would very much enjoy hearing the sounds of my superior genetic offspring, although with the current workload that Jose' gives me, I am relegated to cyber sex through Yahoo messenger. How fortunate for me I can also type with my feet



Do you have armpit hair?
Of course I have armpit hair. Unlike you human beings, I don't see the need to exfoliate. Believe me, when I tell you that you would look just as silly to us.



Do you consider yourself a good friend?
Of course I am a good friend.



Is a college education important?
All education is important



Do you believe in spanking your child?
Yes, it IS a jungle out there.



Should the girl or the guy pay for a date if the girl asks him out?
Pay? Pay for what? To frolic and swing in the lush and beautiful jungle that provides nourishment and shelter? And you claim to be at the top of the food chain. Cretins



How old should kids be to start dating?
We Computer Monkeys don't date and we don't have a mating season, we swing all year long. Yes, we ARE naughty little monkeys.



How many guys does a girl have to sleep with to be considered a slut?
I do not understand labeling a willing sex partner.



How many girls does a guy have to sleep with to be considered a man whore?
Excuse me, I was busy.



Should teens be allowed to get tattoos?
Not to sound rude, but if you are a consenting legal adult at the age of eighteen...are you not still a teen?



Do you want a big or small wedding?
Next Question Please.



Is your best friend a virgin?
No, my best friend works by the hour.



What is your favorite Movie?
Planet of the Apes




to be continued...


Currently listening:

Demon Days
By Gorillaz
Release date: 2005-05-24

Jul 11, 2009

TWITTER THOUGHTS

I don't feel like doing anything today.

TWITTER THOUGHTS

If Jesus loves me...why did he keep beating me up in grade school. Jesus was a mean kid...oh that was "Hey Zeus"...sorry Jesus, my bad!!